“Oh, to be a center fielder, a center fielder–and nothing more!”
Alexander Portnoy, Portnoy’s Complaint (1969)
From my private stash of baseball cards: Topps, Donruss, Fleer, Bowman ’85 – ’93, mostly.
Dedicated to the institution of uncledom, wherever it may dwell.
If you peel away the Dole-Kemp stickers, you can still make out the Lost Uncle bills posted on the utility pole on the northwestern corner of Third and Regret. Reward: a shave.
Disappointed uncles aren’t mad at you, no, not exactly, no —
Everyone has an uncle who fears the black helicopters. Few see them as frequently as this uncle.